Here is one thing that I’m not
I am not the carpet that holds your feet
(I am starting to see something
Maybe we are one and the same
Cut from the same cloth)
Maybe I am just as fluent in lies and just as prickly as a sandpaper tongue I run away from uneven forms and I resent walls that close in
I lost my voice back home and it’s never coming back
Three barriers to my peace
Hope that maybe He returns and all is well
To want to dissipate
I want them to phantomize
Walk across the wall
Cut the ribbon and walk the line
I am ready to trick or treat
Forgiveness disguised as doormathood
And doormathood disguised as me
I have morphed into something I never thought I could become
From the monster that throws the chair to the mouse that bites her tongue I am aching every morning
Every pot of coffee tastes like a bitter potion
Every cup of tea tastes like resentment and taboo
I wish I could cut my tongue off and wear it as a scarf
I want to throw every limb at them
I want to crawl out of my skin and make them wear it for once
Things upon things upon things…
The sparkly pieces that distract from the silence
A room full of toys and we’ve been playing
I present some gold and we all dig in
Take it, take it, and take from me
Perverted laughter, backhanded compliments, and false hope are the wrapping paper of my nightmares
Put a bow on my lips
My mother told me she was selfish
I didn’t believe her until she yanked my hair and dragged me up the stairs My mother told me that words that sting are words that wish
Leave HOPE behind
Apathy kissing their lips
(It was random, you were just unlucky)
Wondering if maybe they’d fall down too
I don’t think I know what love is
So open the door and let me in
Leave Elijah behind
I am sick and tired of shelling myself
And I am nauseous from all the wrapping
I have nothing left to give
Pour the wine out and cut me open
Let the carpet cave in and the words become intolerable
